Laying To Rest The “Final Four”

Men’s college basketball’s Final Four needs a vocabulary makeover – if only for PR reasons.

Take the phrase “Final Four.” The term is about as uplifting as four victims from a motor vehicle accident awaiting the morgue. Or the “Elite Eight.” Snore. How about the “Sweet Sixteen?” With all due respect, it’s never a good idea to name an important round of a men’s tournament after a birthday party for a teenage girl.

Now, it’s important to note that the NCAA has copyrighted most of these as trademarks for its legal protection. The NCAA has a lot of prestige, advertising and sponsorship invested in these names.

In other words, money. These phrases have become part of the NCAA “brand.”

So for NCAA basketball, what are the alternatives? Try these:

Instead of the “Final Four,” freshen it up to the much-younger “Ultimate Four,” which brings it several generations back from the grave, and borrows from Ultimate Frisbee, not yet a full-fledged NCAA sport.

• Instead of the “Elite Eight,” how about the “Great Eight?” This at least rhymes, and harkens to the awesomeness of reaching this goal.
• And finally, instead of the “Sweet Sixteen,” how about the “Power Sixteen,” which befits a round that rewards teams on making it to this level.
• Just think about it: A new set of names that takes these rounds well into the 21st century. Think big, and maybe they will catch on.

And while I’m trying to get the NCAA’s attention, here’s one for CBS Sports: How about inducing Jim Nantz into early retirement? (There are reports that 2020 will be his last Masters golf tournament.)

Let’s update men’s college hoops, and add him to that list.